ArachnoPhobia 03 Jokes

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Hi there!here's Carnage back on the keys
and for the second time with the joking-
chapter.
Let's start with the funiest chapter
ever, so please enjoy it!!!


TUNE BY: Rob Hubbard

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Some guy on a cattle-marked wants to buy
a horse from a breeder.


The guy: How much for this horse?

Breeder: 1000 dollar

The guy: the half

Breeder: I don't want to sell this horse
         in two pieces!!!

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Waiter -> man in a restaurant:

How would you like your stake, medium?

What about extra large?

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Millionaire's wife: "I think that
                     10000 dollar for
                     a portrait is
                     quit expensive."

Painter: "It could be cheaper, but it
          would look more like you."

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Two nitwits drive beside each other.

than one says to the other:

"Can I drive in the middle now?"

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"Doctor, my husband thinks he's an UFO."

-"Let him come during office-hours."-

"Ok, when can he land?"

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A man and his dog are in a bar playing
cards.

Someone says: "What a smart dog."

The owner of the dog:

"Not really, everytime when he gets a
good card, his will wag his tail."

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"Why do most of the nitwits have a flat
back of their head?"

"Because when they drink, the toilet-
seat drops on their head!!!"

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A friend tells another:

"My girlfriend dumped me today."

-"Why?"-

"I told her her panty-hose rimpled."

-"Because of something so stupid?"-

"Yes, it seemed she wasn't even
 wearing one."

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"I've found 4 horse-shoe's, what does
 that mean again?"

"That means that there's a horse on
 bare feet!!!"

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"Waiter, what's that fly doing in my
 soup?"

"I believe that he's doing the breast
 stroke, sir!!!"

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"What did your wife say, when you got
 home so late last night?"

"Nothing and I allready wanted to remove
 those 2 teeth anyway!!!"

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Wife -> Husband

"It's true, every morning when that man
 goes to his office he kisses his wife,
 why do you never do that?"

"Well, I don't even know her."

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"I haven't slept for a long time."

"Why is that?"

"Well, my wife thinks that she's a
 fridge and because she sleeps with
 a open mouth, the light keeps
 shining in my face."

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"Don't you think that my wife is a
 good singer?"

"I can't hear you!"

"Don't you think that my wife is a
 good singer?"

"Sorry, I can't hear you, because that
 stupid woman over there is shouting,
 so I can't hear any of your words!!"

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"Doctor, I have a nail in my foot, can
 you do something about it, because
 I have difficulties with walking!!!"

"I can believe that, because you also
 have a plank under it from 2 meters
 long!!!"

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"Two deafmutes where sitting infront of
 me in the bus this morning and one
 of them had a speechdefect."

"How can a deafmute have a
 speechdefect?"

"He missed two of his fingers!!!"

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A stutterer is being nagged.

"B-b-but everyone has a d-d-defect,
 which h-h-hand do you use to w-w-wipe
 your ass when you are on the
 t-t-toilet?"

"My right hand."

"N-n-now t-t-that's your defect,
 m-m-most people use t-t-toiletpaper to
 wipe their ass."

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Allrighty then, I hope you enjoyed this
chapter and if not than send me
something and tell me what you didn't
like or write it on the back of an
ARACHNOPHOBIA votesheet!!!!
Oh and cool jokes can also be put on the
back of the sheet, please do so!
That's all, until next time and keep
your heads cool!!!

                         carnage is off!

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