Condom 06
From C64 Diskmag Wiki
Contents |
Editorial
HELLO READERS this is the 6th edition of our maga- zine! first the usual information... staff ROUGH/CHROMANCE ebm,hardcore,thrash,ska JAKE/PULSAR punk,hardcore,death IMBECIL/- hardcore,punk,thrash also thanks to our free workers... sodom/akrak,warlock/xentrix and all the others,whose name i maybe forgot! this issue is the one for MAY and the next is released in JUNE of course! so watch out,ANARCHISTS here's the contact address... CONDOM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX we got a lot of positive reaction but only short ones like i love your mag, it's brill and so on from people like mr.wax/chromance and merlin/omega we also got some kind of a negative re action! the "very cool" magazine eman- uelle turned down the magazine and sla gged on the whole thing with things li ke 'this is lame' and 'that is lame'! well,this maybe is their real opinion their very own right to think so,but if they only aim of this test was to mess with us around and attack us (esp.me!) then listen... kids,if you want have problems,then say it! GOT THAT,"AUSTRIA'S #1"!!!??? hahaha! even t'pau or silicon are kinx against your bunch...! well,it's not my intention to fight with everyone who doesnt like things we do,but if they want so... THE PERSONAL KISSES AND WISHES TO: jake,imbecil,SKANARCHIST(who's that?) vampire,zwerg(hargh,old troublemaker!) tom,mr.wax,dense,herman,dr.disc,ivory, slime,alf,sodom,creep,nothingface, biene,hausalarm,sabine,nina,karina, united krach,donald,ursi,vroni,jimjams, all old ajz lovers (let it be alive) mmc,andy,steamhammer(gotta meet ya!), birgit,rico and all the other posse! SEE YA,NEXT MONTH,over to some words by JAKE! ...one day is fine, and next is black! so if you want me off your back. so you got to let me know..... SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO! this is jake's part of the EDITORIAL okay, i don't know, what to write, but i will try to find sumthing. i guess, this time we have a really powerful issue and if imbecil would correct the bugs in loader, the mag would be better anyway, hahaha! by the way, did ya know, that roughy-boy works in his freetime in a real bavarian 'beergarden'. i think, that's cool! maybe i visit ya sumtime! well, to end my page, i will write my personal thanx & greets, which go to: my family, michi, jo, gordon, markus, FELIX (c.u. all in 'new force!), mueller (with his fucking pc!), corinna (thanx for listening to me!), mike (bk sucks!) the greets continue.... all partylions from 'rock up', all dudes from 'new force', and all punks from 'komm' in nuremberg, even if i don't know anyone of ya personally! fuckinx to all ignorants, muthafuckers, new dicks on the block, nazis & skins, suit & tie guys, post-men (hi scatter!), and all german-democracy-lovers. sum explainings to my last fucking.... i always thought, that DEMOCRACY is, dat everybody can choose over the hands of a party, what he wants. but who the fuck wanted, (except the dumb politicians!) that the taxes will be raised? or that the phone gets more expensive soon? and everything because that fucking GDR! i never wanted the unity, but i MUST pay for it! i don't wanted the war in the gulf, but i have to pay for it! the politicians are assfucking liers and i hate them. everybody is corrupt! i mean, if they wanna have the unity, then the politicians shall pay it from their own money, coz i guess, they earn more than enough! deutschland ist jetzt eins - OH NEIN! das schlimmste, was europa juengst er- fahren hat.... deutschland so wie einst - OH NEIN! das schlimmste, was die welt je ertragen hat.... was 'deutsch' ist, brauch ich nicht, ich will die einheit nicht! deutsche stolze mag ich nicht, das deutsch-sein wird zur pflicht! helmut, der kohl, schickt deutsche in den krieg, kaiser franz will den deutsch en sieg, deutscher ruhm, deutsche pop- ularitaet, hat in deutschland fuer so manchen hoechste prioritaet! ich bin dafuer, dass die mauer wieder hochgezogen wird, was aber nicht heisst, dass ich fuer onkel honni bin. man kann ja ein eigenstaendiger staat bleiben, und so zu uns sein, wie holland oder was weiss ich. dass man ohne visum reisen kann, aber die EINHEIT ist das allerletzte. IHR VERDAMMTEN ARSCHLOECHEr and der macht, habt ihr nichts aus der vergangenheit gelernt? wenn ein gewisser teil polens auch noch zu uns kommt (was kohl am liebsten haette!!), dann erinnert mich das irgendwie an 1938! NIE WIEDER GROSSDEUTSCHLAND! jake.... p.s. maybe my editor-pals may write thei opinion to this theme here, too! i would to say some things about music generally! you could wonder why i, ROUGH,to so many different music styles well,it's a simple reason i think from every music style there are good + bad examples,from the one more and from the other less... for example i really love to hear this: thrash metal(suicidal tendencies,mega- deht,nuclear assault) crossover (faith no more,prong) death metal (napalm death,slayer) hardcore (bad religion,nofx,tankard) hip hop (de la soul,3rd bass,a tribe..) rap (public enemy,2 life crew,run dmc) ebm (alien sex fiend,front 242,skinny puppy) techno (renegade soundwave,the shamen) house (bomb the bass,c+c music factory) punk (slime,dead kennedys,spermbirds) fun punk (brieftauben,zitronen,lustf.) psychobilly (klingonz,meteors,swampies) ska (blue killaz,skaos) skatecore (red hot chili p,gang green) satanwave (dead can dance,das ich) good pop (chris isaac,del amitri) well,you see a lot of different musics and if you ask how this is possible... i can only tell you MUSIC IS MY LIFE £ and last the credits... INTRO... -------- code imbecil - logo jake pulsar char ? omega music griff chromance MAIN... ------- code imbecil - logo gnu - char ? cosmos l.char ? ? music danko x-censor loader ultraload
Tourdates
YO BROTHAZ! the tour dates... VANILLA ICE 03.07 muenchen 04.07 duesseldorf 05.07 berlin 06.07 hamburg 07.07 frankfurt GUNS'N ROSES 24.08 mannheim (45dm+vvk) FISHER Z 15.05 koeln FATS DOMINO 10.05 kiel 13.05 nuernberg 14.05 kassel RAVI SHANKAR 14.05 muenchen 15.05 berlin INXS 02.07 berlin 09.07 muenchen VAYA CON DIOS 08.06 konstanz 09.06 koeln 28.06 berlin 30.06 hamburg CHICK COREA 05.07 hamburg 06.07 aachen COMMODORES 09.05 trier 12.05 bremerhaven 13.05 muenster 14.05 hannover PAUL SIMON 15.06 st goarshau.20.06 muenchen 27.06 berlin 29.06 hamburg 03.07 stuttgart 04.07 dortmund HERBERT GROENEMAYER+BAND+wolf maahn 14.05 hannover 16.05 rostock 18.05 berlin 19.05 leipzig 20.05 dresden 22.05 aue 24.05 (a)wien 25.05 mannheim STING 13.05 muenchen 14.05 muenchen 15.05 stuttgart 17.05 frankfurt 29.06 freiburg 03.07 berlin 14.07 bremen 17.07 neu-ulm THE ALARM 10.06 bremen 11.06 berlin 13.06 hannover 14.06 bielefeld 16.06 bochum 17.06 stuttgart 18.06 muenchen SISTERS OF MERCY 09.05 hannover 10.05 berlin 12.05 hamburg 13.05 muenster 14.05 essen JOE JACKSON+HUE AND CRY 18.05 muenster 19.05 frankfurt 31.05 hamburg 15.06 duesseldorf 16.06 stuttgart 17.06 MANU DIBANGO+SOUL MAKOSSA GANG 10.05 erlangen 11.05 bad reichenh. 12.05 muenchen 13.05 frankfurt 14.05 dortmund 15.05 koeln 17.05 hannover 18.05 hamburg 19.05 berlin 20.05 bremen HEINZ RUDOLF KUNZE 09.05 hamburg 10.05 hamburg 11.05 kiel 12.05 hameln 14.05 duesseldorf 15.05 oberhausen 16.05 muenster 17.05 hagen 18.05 hannover BIZARRE 91 FESTIVAL on 29/30 june in giessen...pixies,danzig,new model army iggy pop,the alarm,bad religion and mor INSPIRAL CARPETS 09.05 hamburg 12.05 koeln 14.05 frankfurt 15.05 berlin 16.05 muenchen 808 STATE 18.05 koeln 23.05 dortmund 25.05 berlin 26.05 frankfurt 27.05 stuttgart 28.05 muenchen POEMS FOR LEILA 21.05 dresden 23.05 (a)st.poelten 24.05 (a)klagenf. 25.05 (a)innsbruck 26.05 muenchen 27.05 ulm 28.05 stuttgart 29.05 freiburg 30.05 (ch)bern 01.06 meschede 02.06 eschwege 03.06 frankfurt 04.06 trier 05.06 nuernberg 07.06 (f)paris 08.06 (f)caen 10.06 oberhausen 11.06 bielefeld 12.06 hannover 13.06 hamburg 14.06 bremen 15.06 bingen 17.06 koeln EMF 29.05 muenchen 30.05 frankfurt 02.06 koeln 04.06 berlin 05.06 hamburg 12.06 bielefeld LIVING COLOUR 19.06 ludwigsburg 20.06 muenchen 21.06 nuernberg 26.06 bremen PIXIES 01.07 muenchen KING KONG 11.05 freiburg 12.05 kaiserlautern 14.05 nuernberg 15.05 stuttgart 16.06 wuerzburg 19.05 berlin 22.05 braunschweig 23.05 hannover 24.05 bad segeberg 25.05 flensburg 27.05 hamburg 28.05 bremen 29.05 osnabrueck 30.05 goettingen DREAM WARRIORS+GANG STARR 09.05 stuttgart 10.05 duesseldorf 11.05 berlin 12.05 hamburg LENNY KRAVITZ 17.05 hamburg 18.05 berlin 21.05 frankfurt 22.05 muenchen 26.05 bonn FRONT 242 26.05 ludwigsburg 27.05 muenchen HAPPY MONDAYS,DEEE-LITE,SOUP DRAGONS 22.06 hamburg 24.06 berlin 25.06 koeln 26.06 muenchen ABWAERTS 21.05 aurich 22.05 muenster 23.05 schwerte 24.05 bremen 25.05 hohenlockst.28.05 berlin 29.05 frankfurt 30.05 waldkirch 31.05 (ch)luzern 01.06 (ch)schaffhaus. 03.06 aachen 05.06 heidelberg 06.06 feldwies 07.06 esterhofen 08.06 biberach 09.06 sindelfingen 14.06 fulda 15.06 (ch)zuerich 16.06 nuernberg 17.06 kassel 19.06 detmold 20.06 hannover 22.06 hamburg 23.06 neuss 24.06 muenchen 30.06 berlin 05.07 dortmund THE FALL 14.05 hamburg 22.05 muenchen 23.05 frankfurt 24.05 muenster 26.05 bielefeld 27.05 stuttgart 28.05 koeln 30.05 bremen 02.06 berlin MORDRED 12.05 frankfurt 13.05 muenchen 14.05 stuttgart 15.05 koeln 16.05 berlin 17.05 hamburg £18.05 bremen 19.05 essen PRIMUS 01.06 hamburg 02.06 berlin 03.06 bochum 05.06 koeln 06.06 herford 08.06 muenchen 09.06 frankfurt 10.06 stuttgart BAD BRAINS 24.06 erlangen 25.06 frankfurt 26.06 stuttgart 28.06 bielefeld JINGO DE LUNCH 15.05 (ch)olten 16.05 (ch)bern 17.05 (a)dorn 18.05 passau LENINGRAD COWBOYS 24.05 obernburg 25.05 ulm 26.06 wuerzburg 27.05 nuernberg 31.05 muenchen 01.06 freiburg 02.06 ludwigsburg03.06 mannheim 04.06 oberhausen 05.06 herford 06.06 berlin 07.06 luebeck 08.06 marburg 09.06 karlsruhe 10.06 frankfurt DR.ALBAN 17.05 schuttorf 18.05 bielefeld 19.05 hamburg 20.05 kempen 21.05 wuerzburg 22.05 post-bauernheng
Charts
this are jake's personal lp-charts... 1. TOY DOLLS - fat bobs feet 2. WALTER ELF - die angst der tormanns.. 3. S.O.D. - speak english or die! 4. d.r.i. - 4 of a kind! 5. jingo de lunch - underdog 6. emils - wer frisst wen? 7. suicidal tendencies - light, camera.. 8. dead kennedys - frankenchri$t 9. spermbirds - thanx...live! 10.3rd bass - the cactus revisited the single song charts follow... 1. TOY DOLLS - back in '79 2. WALTER ELF - ramstein fluchtag 3. S.O.D. - kill yourself 4. d.r.i. - dead in a ditch 5. jingo de lunch - new key 6. emils - geld rueckt koepfe gerade 7. suicidal tendencies - u can't bring.. 8. dead kennedys - chicken farm 9. spermbirds - you're not a punk! stagedive dudes! this is the ultimate jake with THREE really kicking concert-reports.... here ya will find the storys from gigs like:MOTOERHEAD + CYCLE SLUTS FROM HELL, MEGADETH + ALMIGHTY + ALICE IN CHAINS, and EMILS + SUCKSPEED + CAPITOL PUNISH- MENT. MOTOERHEAD + CYCLE SLUTS FROM HELL 1st, march 1991, neumarkt/jurahalle scatter and me drove together with frog in his car to neumarkt, which lies about 70 kilometres away from erlangen. we found immediately the jurahalle, where a lot of bangers & cyclers waited for entrance. finally the opened the door at about 19.45 and we squeezed ourself through the whole shit-crowd. at about 20.10 the C.S.F.H. entered the stage and what a surprise. four, really slut looking like, girls came to kick ass, but the lame audience (only stupid manta-metallers and farmers with armless jeansjackets (besser als kutte bekannt!) ) ignored them and some screamed every time 'ausziehen'. okay, okay! i would have not looked away, if they had dressd off, but i think it's stupid to shout sumthing to a cool woman band. anyway, i loved them & their music and will buy the record soon, if i find it in a store. by the road, one of the guitar- players was the ex-OVERKILL bobby gus- tafson. i guess, the most farmers did not recognized him as him, but the exact eye of jake recognizes everything! (schleim!!!) after a break of about a quarter of an hour, MOTOERHEAD entered and began their set with DR.ROCK. no- body could hold me on my place. i starte slamming like a distorted asshole and beat the living shit out of sum other slammers (not really, sucker!!) after the cool opener, MOTOERHEAD began to bore around. yes really, they only played tracks of their new album, which i don't like at all, and classics like 'bomber' or 'roadcrew' they left at home. and the worst thing was, that they finished playing after ONE hour. and guess what the entrance costed us..... 35,- german marks. that really sucks! be sure to meet me never again on a MOTOERHEAD gig, if they will not improve their style. good beginning - bad end! MEGADETH + ALMIGHTY + ALICE IN CHAINS 12th, march 1991, fuerth, stadthalle in the last issue we already had a repor of this tour, but this was from MUNICH and this here is from FUERTH. so i only will tell ya a short version of the whole thing. again we climbed in frogs car and drove to fuerth, which lies about 15 km far away from my hometown. as we entered, A.I.C. were already playing their last song and so i can't give a further im- pressions of the group, as i don't know them at all. ALMIGHTY entered and only sum farmers got rid of their adrenalin. personally i must say, that they are not bad, but i saved on this evening my power for the main-act, and so i only watched this gig with a mug of beer in my hand. not bad! then they came...MEGADETH. and they were the only winners of this evening. they played everything, from classics to the new songs.....everything. and guess what i did meanwhile???? yeah, slamming till the shoes were smoking. by the way, sum stupid civil-cops beat sum slammers up, without any reason. WE DON'T CARE, WHAT YA SAY...FUCK YA!. this was the only gig, were i really slammed so much, that i couldn't go right after the cocnert. so i stumbled and creeped into the car of frog, who says everytime the same thing to me: 'jake, du bist verrueckt!' i don't care, if ya are to lame to slam then stay on yer feet in the last row. scatter also only watched like a cow, but who gives a fuck anyway. one of the best concerts i were, and for 32,- german marks ya got sumthing to believe in. and now the ultimate concert from.... EMILS + SUCKSPEED + CAPITOL PUNISHMENT 27th, march 1991, burgebrach, steigerw. on this wednesday, everything went wrong but let's start from the beginning. in my firm, i got call from scatter, who told me, that frog will not drive to the concert, coz his car broke down. NICE!!! i told frog, that i will go undr every conditions, equal if frog will drive, or not! we decided to go by train to the concert-place. then we asked a woman on the train-station, how we come at the fastest way to burgebrach. whe said, that we must go by train to bam- berg and then with the train-bus to burgeberach. okay, we bought our tickets and went a little bit in the city, coz we had a little bit time. guess what happened? we missed the train to bamberg and so we had to take the next, in which we had to pay 3,- dm more, coz we drove nonstop. SHIT! the train reached bamberg 10 minutes after the other one before, but these 10 minutes changed the situation. we also missed also train-bus and the next to burgebrach drove in one and a half hour. again big SHIT! first we wanted to walk, but we didn't know the way, so we waited for the bus. he came, and guy from the gdr sold us our tickets for about 4,- dm. after a really 'gonna make you sweat'-trip with this very old bus, we reached the little farmer-villag burgebrach and we found the hall. it was now about 20.10 and the concert had not started. at about 20.15 the let us in and i can't believe my eyes. only PUNKS (real punks...with iro etc..) and other crazy dudes were in this hall! first i climbed the merchandise-stand but i forgot my money and so i couldn't buy one of those cool'n'cheap shirts. FUCK! at about 20.30 a local band started playing. i don't know their name, but it was not bad. nuffing to say more about this band! then CAPITOL PUNISHMENT enterd with thei female basser and they made a great show. the shouter was really cool, coz he got crazy and always made faces. the songs were very funny. i never heard of this band before, but i will inform myself and will buy a album of them. after sum stagebuildings, SUCKSPEED came and i must admit, that also they were not bad. i didn't like them sum time ago, but the new songs really kick ass! by the road, the hall was not very crowded (it was wednesday!!!) and so there was not much kicking mood to made a slam-pit. at this position, i wanna greet the guy, who i called myself 'feuerwehr-wedel' and guess why??? he wore a fire-red leather-jacket (real ugly colour!!) and his hairs were sum kind of crazy. everything around his head shaved and only on the top he had hairs, which reached down to his shoulde and guess, why i named him '...wedel?' he had a really strange kind of banging (stranger than me!!!!) he shaked his head and stepped everytime a step back. as i stood behind him, we always threw his fucking 'wedel'-hair in my face! as i kicked him in his ass, he looked at me and continued in his strange dance! arrgh! okay, at about 22.00 the german hardcore-kings from hamburg came on stage....EMILS. in the beginning ille appeared and gave sum signings from the band. i couldn't catch sum... fuck! then they began to play and the audience went crazy. in a few minutes the hall was a sauna and i was quite surprised, that the punks slammed so hard. they really ran in high-speed through the hall and rammed (really ramming!) everything. so i decided just to watch the show, coz i had to work on the next day and so i didn't want to consist only of blue stains at the next day. EMILS made a great show and ille was very cool. he wore only sum jogging-trousers and a 24-7 shirt and looked with his felt-hairs very funny. the basser was one of the fastest i saw in my life. anyway, the concert ended up at 23.30 and this was very shitty. the fucken cops declared, that there it has to be quiet in the neighborhood and so, EMILS finished wiwth a medley of old rulin' slime-songs. the concert was over, but my report continues. it was now 23.35 and we were in a farmer village and then we realized the ugly truth....at this time, there drove no bus anymore to bamberg back! what now. we both had to work at the next day, and so we couldn't wait till morning! so we simply walked to the next (???) phone-cell, which lay about 2 kilometres far away and we called my dad. he was already sleeping but nevertheless he jump in his clothes and drove about 70 kilometres to burgebrach to catch us. he was kinda angry and said almost nothing during the travel. finally i will tell ya, what we had of this evening..... - a nerve-attack -an angry father - sum shocks -140 kilometres in - a cool concert the night £ - a 'feuerwehr-wedel' - and a report for this mag that's all for now. hope ya enjoyed a little bit. jake p.s. next time there will probably be a report from the following con- certs.... 16.05. G.B.H. + RUMBLE MILITIA 19.05. ROCK HARD FESTIVAL 24.05. HARD-ONS (my brothers birhtday) so keep on slamming, rapping or whatever ya do.....
News
brumm brumm fuckers! this is jake of PULSAR with the ultimate news-corner. here ya can read everything about hardcore & thrash-metal. so let's kick it (without v.i.p!!!) -there will be a rock-hard festival in BERLIN on 18.05 and in LICHTENFELS on 19.05. in berlin will play: amored saint, blind guardian + special guest. on the OPEN AIR in LICHTEFELS there will play: obituary, kreator, blind guardian, amored saint, morgoth & overkill. be sure to be there! -RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS changed their record-label from emi to warner bros. they will record their new album soon under rick rubin (from def jam...yo!) -death metal kings OBITUARY lost their lead-guitarist james murphy. he is now in the english band CANCER. -THE GREAT KAT (the sick woman!) has signed a lifelong deal with keith rawis, who supported MEGADETH and FLOTSAM & JETSAM. -the best & funniest us-band MUCKY PUP changed their basser mark d. baker to junior (not from megadeth !!!) -MORGOTH and KREATOR will attack usa soon. amis, get ready for german death and thrash-power! -RUMBLE MILITIA were arrested in the usa coz the corrupt police hold staffi (an unshaved and long-haired greek) for a terrorist. as ya know, hacki is a turk and so he lives for every ami in front of bagdad. fuck the cops! -ACCU$ER have a 17 year old guitarist! strange eh??? -PARDISE LOST released their second lp 'gothic'. -FAITH NO MORE's big sick ugly jim is a psychopath (according to rock hard!) -we (scatter and me) realized, that the places of the upcoming tour of INCUBUS and DISHARMONIC ORCHESTRA are very funny....here they are: hannover.........mad koeln............rose club waiblingen.......villa (wilder?) roller bad woerishofen..u2 (hae???) wels.............alter (!) schlachthof (oesi-attack!) frankfurt........negativ (aids?????) dortmund.........fzw (Freies Zentrum der Wahnsinnigen) aue (ddr-uaarg!).tanztreffpunkt (hae??) berlin...........surprise (ohne scheiss kopenhagen.......tba (no comment!) esbjerg (eisberg).aktivitethuset (ok!) £ karsdorf.............clubhaus der (!) zementwerker prag.................no location!!!! wien.................monsters of death metal tour contact: mad 030-7866844 berlin this is no joke, just laughing reality! -SEPULTURA captured the rock in rio festival as a successor! this was all from my side today! bye... zementing jake....
Tests I
welcome to the DANCEFLOOR corner of the record tests! this time we have a lot of BRANDNEW and also a few classic releases! chief-dj ROUGH also couldnt hold back to test some pop songs to turn them down... here we go: ROXETTE/JOY RIDE... well,what can you except from them! another bullshit! the whole song sounds maybe nice to poppers,but in my ears it's only crap,the only 'nice' thing is the whistling,hehe! i already saw the public liked it as it got #1 in ge rmany,it's a pity! 24% STING/ENGLISHMAN IN NEW YORK-BL REMIX bl stands for BEN LIEBRAND who is one of the best remixers in the world and comes from holland! he mixed up stings songs with some fine instruments and rhythms! especially outstanding is the saxophone...this is already rather old but rather cool,too! 71% NIKKI D/DADDIE'S LITTLE GIRL this song is probably of the most easi- est made ever! they simply took the ba- ssline from dna's 'tom's diner' includ- ing some singsangs from suzanne vega! mixed a female,nice rap voice and sum additional extras to it and ready is the new hit. the new hit? na,the song sounds nice but from the tom's diner theme the air is out already long time a little bit too late,girl! 63% JOEY B.ELLIS/I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE ONE FOR ME another cut from the ROCKY V theme by joey! after his housebreaker GO FOR IT a more softer song follows,the first listening sounded very lame,but you've to hear the tune more often and it re- ally jumps in the ear by time! could be a hit! if he goes on this way this guy can be get as famous as others... 74% MONIE LOVE VS ADEVA/RING MY BELL what's that?! a coproduction between monie and adeva...i say it at once:it's fuckin' cool! monie love raps as great as it would be for the last time and adeva sings in voiceareas which sounds so awesome...a groovy duo anyway! the idea to build up the song like a fight between both is also brilliant! not to forget the sounds itself: a very dance able song...check it out! 82% CATHY DENNIS/TOUCH ME(ALL NIGHT LONG) a nice danceable song with a white voi ce! the singer cathy dennis worked as far as i know in earlier times 2getha with d-mob and had a hit with him! i must really say she sings good but she even looks damned good,that's what i call a pretty one,suckaz! the rhythm jumps in the ear! no hit but cool any way 73% 2 IN A ROOM/SHE'S GOT ME GOING CRAZY remember the 6 months old 'wiggle it' still storming the pouser charts.this succesor sounds familiar but that does not mean it's a hit again! i think it is too average 47% SHADES OF RHYTHM/SWEET SENSATION yeah,the first techno track for today already let's my mind get more x-cited the track is x-tremely danceable,the female voice is cool,the background new age effects suit perfect,these guys will storm the charts soon,maybe not with song,but they already proved with other songs their first class quality 77% i think techno will soon hit the charts as klf (ambient house) already rides forward to all the other GOOOD groups! fuck swingbeat,chartdancefloorshit! THE SHAMEN/HYPERREAL yeaaaaaaaaaahhhhh,the shamen are back with an extreeeemely cool tune! this song is so awesome,techno from the fin est side you can imagine! i think the shamen even beats my personal favorite RENEGADE SOUNDWAVE! also the three sha men are very cool...the singer sings extrakewl,the technician features his damned kewl hairstyle and the female voice looks damned cool,because she is not styled in the normal 08/15 way like every other singer... 87% HYPNOTONE/YU-YU techno tune#3 4 2day! well,this is more an average song! the dancefeeling is asskickin' like hell,but the kewlness is missing! the video features some nice gfx but the biggest joke is that 1 of the hypnotone guys all the time play s that fuckin' gameboy shit in the vid- eo! maybe lamers should think it's a cool musicinstrument... 60% brumm brumm condom fans! guess who's back again? it's jake of PULSAR to bring ya the latest lp-tests from me and i guess, that we'll need a lot of memory this time, coz i have about twenty new records! so let's kick it...... ANGKOR WAT - when obscenity becomes the norm...awake! a rather long title, eh? behind this name, there are five guys, who play thrash-hardcore with anti-war lyrics! i think, this group could be very famous if they had a better promoter, coz i almost never heard of them before! but for thrash fans and tolerant hardcore- freax, i can say, that they should buy this record! rating...75% BROKEN BONES - losing control i think, this is the latest lp from the broken bones, but don't kill me, if i am not right! if ya're a skater, than ya must the broken bones or ya're lame! the music is very crossover-skate-thrash like and the raw sound belongs to it! but this lp can't beat their old ones! bones...80% CRYPTIC SLAUGHTER - money talks yeah, this record is cult in the hard- core scene! money talks...and people listen! tampadam dudeldio! what should i write about it? it's the first lp of cryptic slaughter and don't compare it to their new, coz the new one sucks in compare with the old! the very raw voice from the shouter fascinates me all the time! listen this lp on rpm 45 and ya think a cat is murdered! hehehe! cats....95% DEAD KENNEDYS - in god we trust inc. this mini-lp of 'dk' is well known and i think it's worth to know it! dead kennedys rule anyway...and on every record so let's only say one sentence... nazi punks...fuck off! bullets...95% FAITH NO MORE - live at the brixton academy! yeah, i hear ya scream! and i guess, that all rappers will also read this test! so let's greet them with a loud 'yo!' okay, now to the record. it is only a mini-lp, but with a playing time of about 35 minutes and for a price of about 10,- dm, i think it's worth to buy it! i know, that rough doesn't like my high ratings, but i guess, when i give here 99%, he will be satisfied, too or?? yo's......99% SEPULTURA - under siege! no no, this is not the new record of sepultura, which i promised in the last issue, but it's a maxi with three songs! one of the coming lp, a cover-version of motorhead (orgasmatron!) and an old song from their first lp. i guess, this is only a piece for die-hard sepultura fans! the others may wait for the new longplayer! rating...80% SACRED REICH - alive at the dynamo a ruling and old live lp from sacred reich! i guess, i bought a lot of mini- lp's this month! okay, there are the ruling songs, like surf nicaragua or death squad on it, and that says all... banging power total! rating...85% now some cult punk-lp's... WALTER ELF - heut' oder nie! the first one of walter elf! best songs: zahnarzt, willi und das bier, diese stadt. WALTER ELF - die angst des tormanns beim elfmeter! the second one of walter elf! best songs are: ramstein fluchtag, spaetzuender, robert du depp! WALTER ELF - homo sapiens the third one of walter elf. best songs: acht zylinder, nachts schlag ich meine freundin! walter elf is' the second from the spermbirds-drummer. they play funny & melody punk with german lyrics. for all three records (i bought them all at one time!) there is the same rating! rating...95% SCHLIESSMUSKEL - untergang der abend- laendischen kultur. their first one and i guess, that there they play sum kind strange punk. any- way, it's cool, but ya can't compare it to the new records! the songs are like always very funny, but the sound- quality is very bad (like a demo-tape!) but anyway....cool piece! rating...80% DEUTSCH PUNK - kampflieder yeah, that's what i need! nazis must die on this sampler, there are twenty songs of about eight german punk bands, like slime (the best!), toxoplasma, sluts, daily terror and sum others. but slime rules with their songs...deutschland muss sterben, stoertebeker, polizei- sa-ss, bullenschweine. i love this cd! and for 17,- dm very cheap for a cd! rating...90% now back to the normal international bands.... MORDRED - in this life i guess, that faith no more will get concurrence! this record is also very rappy and with a lot a scratch-effects! they can't beat f.n.m. but .....out of words! rating...85% JELLO BIAFRA & NO MEANS NO - the sky is falling and jello biafra, the shouter i want my of the former dead kennedys mommy! is here in co-op with no means no. sum songs remind me on the old dead kennedys, but sum others are very experimentive. strange piece, but it fits to me, i guess! no rating here! DARK ANGEL - time does not heal yeah, finally they made it. after the lame 'leave scars' record, they released this masterpiece of good thrash. ya must BUY this record, coz if ya copy it ya need two sides of a 90 minutes cass- ette. the exact playing time is: 65 minutes and 34 seconds. for thrashers only! rating...80% £ ADDICTIVE - pity of men i guess, that nobody have ever heard of this band! now sum infos about 'em. they come from australia and play speed- thrash. this is their first lp and i guess, that they will get the testament of METALLICA, coz they beat everyhting what i heard before for their first lp! genial riffs and....ah, listen to it! addictive rules! rating...95%
Tests II
ICED EARTH - iced earth in rock hard, they wrote, that this is the best speed-record of the month. as i don't hear so much speed-metal (except addictive, hehehe!) i can't say it so objective, if this is so cool. but after the reactions in our local metal-pub, the guys like it. i think, the songs are a bit too long, but who gives a fuck anyway??? rating...70% DESPAIR - decay of humanity the only thing, i can say to this record is, that the first of despair ruled more, but everbody says, that they were better, when robert kampf left them one year ago! again i must say, who gives a fuck about it?? rating...75% LUDICHRIST - powertrip all good condom-readers know, what will come now! LUDICHRIST rules! finally i found their second lp in a little record store in erlangen. but what must my ears hear? no hardcore, but thrashcore! i think, that's not so good, but this record is anyway cool, coz it's from ludichrist. if ya don't understand the meaning of my strange sentences, then pleeze notice, that it is about 1.05 am and i am fucking tired. so let's come to a quick end, coz i wanna sleep (till brooklyn???) rating...85% X-MAS PROJECT - sampler hahaha, this record is the party-boom! play the songs on yer next x-mas-party in school and ya'll see what happens! on this sampler, there are bands like rage, living death, holy moses and some others, who play traditional chrismas- songs, like 'leise rieselt der schnee', 'jingle bells' etc. i give no rating again, coz this no real record, but a lot of fun! RUMBLE MILITIA - destroy fascism yeah, again a nice release by the bremer rumble militia-gang. on this record, there are eight songs. four of them are live recorded after a bloody fight against fucking skinheads and the other four songs are no nazis, nazis raus! (by slime!!!), liebe and a.m.f.! the special thing on this lp is, that rumble recorde sum nazi-skins, who talked on the phone to staffi (he's a turk!!) and the voices of them ya can hear on this record before the songs 'nazis raus!' be sure to meet me at rumble militia + g.b.h. concert in may! nazis must die! rating...90% i guess, that was all! i am fucking tired, so let me sleep and leave this corner! bye bye, yers jake i just slept over by tireness and now i am back with sum record tests.... HARD-ONS - yummy! well, i guess, that imbecil had tested this record two issues ago and he said that it's a real cool hardcore-thing! so i slammed in my usual record-store and robbed (joking!) this hard-ons lp. and i must say, that they are very cool and remind me a little bit to 'jingo de lunch'. very melody songs and not typical hardcore, but anyway....cool! rating...80% TOY DOLLS - fat bobs feet hahaha, i just can't finish laughing! rough told me on the phone, that toy dolls is a very cool english fun-punk band. so i checked it out, and bought me their new lp 'fat bobs feet'. and guess, what's it. it's so cool, that everyone, who heard it, wants to have it. that means, that my brother storms in and gave me a tape to copy it (he's 10 years old!!!) and sum girlies from my job-school also want to have it (hi corinna!!!) well as i told ya, ya must hear it. 'i woke up this morning and go the blues all day.....the toy dolls started playing, and i ain't got the blues! coooooool... dolls...95% WALTONS - thrust in the vile have ya ever heard of a music-style, called country-punk??? well, the waltons (cool name!!!) play it. they are three guys, with the names jim-bob, john-boy and jake-bob (ehhh?????) well, anyway this record is sumthing for long car- journeys (to venlo???) to feel the country-groove in yer ass! cows....90% and now, we present to the end, sumthing which is better than SLAYER and will soon capture the whole thrash-scene.... SEPULTURA - arise i told ya last time, that i will test it in the next issue and i made it. they released their fourth lp 'arise' and i guess, that this lp is the thrash-lp of the year! SLAYER will have their probs when SEPULTURA will support them on the upcoming tour. this is the second lp, which deserves this month 99 percents. buy it or die in brasil! sepultura rules in 1991! phew, that was it this month for my lp tests. i didn't tested all of my new records, coz i guess, that the menory will fuck up. i still have five or six new ones, but i am to lazy to name them here! signing off here.... jake yes, skinny puppy are back! after they dissolved the group the single dudes of skinny puppy got problems in earning money. they therefore rebuilt their old canadian ebm/techno group skinny puppy. and they kept the style they played on tin omen first. the whole cd consists of 10 songs and the cd is about 38 minutes long. first of all i give you the hint to buy the cd 'cause there's no pause between the songs so you must programme the songs if you want to copy only one song to tape. the booklet is very well designed. the are their usual weird pictures (like a very big green worm). the cd is produced by using 'add' which means pretty good quality. but let's come back to the songs. the tracks are called convulsion, tormentor, spasmolytic, rash reflection, nature's revenge, shore line poison, grave wisdom, tfwo, morpheus laughing and reclamation. my favourite songs are convulsion, nature's revenge, grave wisdom and morpheus laughing. skinny puppy is still as chaotic as in earlier times. the singer uses his usually computerized voice and there is the (usual) noise with guitar riffs. but their style is simply fantastic. skinny puppy is the canadian version of ein- stuerzende neubauten. skinny puppy uses metal and garbage, too! the texts are presented in the cover. but i must say that it is very hard to read because of the strange writing. neither you won't understand much of the singer if you don't read the texts. anyway, it is a very fresh cd which you should buy 'cause it's completely to the usual ebm/techno stuff. my personal rating: text: 80 per cent music: 100 per cent booklet: 60 per cent sodom of akrak here come sum new tests written by the imbecil! first let's start it off with a ratity: a SUICIDAL BOOTLEG from the year 1983 recorded live in l.a. lately rough and me were stomping thru a record-market looking at the boxes ful of records. rough suddenly stopped turn- ing the records and took out something very familliar. guess what ! the suici- dal bootleg. as i am one of the biggest suicidal tendencies on this planet i bought this piece. now to the content. at home i put it in. it isn't the master piece i had thought it would be, but it could have been worse. the quality is a bit bad, but the songs are well. at that time (1983) the suicidals had not been one of the best technic bands, as they are today. for 30DM i want more than this. so... rating... 60% the next one is THE PLAGUE from NUCLEAR ASSAULT this piece was recorded in '87 and is a MINI-LP. now about the music: the re- cord contains 6 tracks, not boring at all. one instrumental, not bad. pure thrash from england. my favorite song is BUTT FUCK, it is the fastest on the record and very well composed. rating... 75% what comes next? TIME'S UP from LIVING COLOUR living colour came on the scene with the first lp VIVID, and they were regarded now with their second album 'time's up they made the final breakthrough. they mix metal with funk and reggae. this lp is one of my favorites and goes for every man on earth. one thing about the song 'love rears its ugly head': a dance able version came out. it sounds awful. the lp-version is the best. rating: 90% £TESTAMENT with PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH this one came out in '89. i had not been a testament fan till i bought this one just for fun, as i found nothing better. and it was worth buying. testament has got one big theme on this lp: nature. there are songs like 'greenhouse effect' that want to say how bad we hurt nature. i hadn't thought the testament arranges themselves for such themes.music: thrash ,of course,verygood voice of chuck billy rating: 80% now a resently released album: MORBID ANGEL with BLESSED ARE THE SICK you can compare morbid angel to NAPALM DEATH. both are heavy mosh bands, na.de. is still a little bit harder. so if you are a mosher this album is a must. rating: 85%
Adds
sum advertisments...... wanna trade HARDCORE, CROSSOVER and PUNk tapes? then contact the one and only jake/PULSAR XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX (also if ya wanna have the condom every month!) DEUTSCHLAND, ERSTICKE AN DEM WAS DU AUS- GEKOTZT HAST, AN UNS!!! ---------------------------------------- do you search for a die-hard GENESIS & phil collins fan, then try this..... p.r.i./DEPREDATORS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX (also for manta-jokes, hehehehe!) £ FOR SWAPPING EBM,HARDCORE,PUNK,THRASH TAPES or everything about CONDOM try... rough/chromance XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX poppers,loosers and fashists may lay down and die...hehe!
Special Reports
'ELLO BROTHAZ! theeze are the concert repots in this edition! i dont know how many we gonna get but it should be enuff... BLUE KILLA concert in FEIERWERK/MUNICH oops,hope i can remember that coz it's already a few weeks ago,blue killa is a SKA band and ska is one of the most exciting music styles nowadays! well RICO,ZWERG,VAMPIRE and me went to that fuckin' place by train together with sum other dudes and a lot of girls who we met on a trainstation! the trip was very nerving,because zwerg just has sha ved his head and had only a flat and everybody wanted to see and kidded him a little bit! well,we went there and i was very bored,because some of these girls were very arrogant bitches! i ha te that and i nearly couldnt hold back to say my opinion,first it was extremly boring,they showed a film about america ska bands and their concert,which maybe was interesting but not that good at all! after a long time BLUE KILLA star ted to play and guess what?! from the first minute on we danced,raved and grooved like a fire,we four together did a cool job and they played all the ir AWESOME tunes like CAMELMAN,WERBUNG SKASHIP ENTERPRISE and we danced,sweat ed,like a fever,like a dream! only fun! and then their last song came,we just were making a little drinkbreak when they played 'WICKIE UND DIE STARKEN MAENNER' i took zwerg,threw him into the masses and pogued him down like he ll,after he was a little bit surprised he realized all and started to pogue back xtremely hard,i nearly couldnt stand anymore! it was so awesome! i must say that this was ONE when not THE best concerts i've ever been on! after the gig we walked to the train a guy called LOCKENPUNK found a gas spray in VAMPIRE's jacket! he took it along to fight against skins or turkey gangs if they would attack us! and this ass said 'uh! what's that?'! i turned around + guess what?! he sprayed in the air and me and a girl got it into our faces ! aaargh! 10 minutes of tearing and cry ing! believe me guys,it's no nice feel ing! he xcused after at least! on the trip home we had nothing special xcept i talked a little bit to the other che eks who were very nice'n pretty in fact ha! i first thought they were arrogant too! but wrong,roughy! we also met one of our teachers in the train(at 1 a.m) wondering where he has been....?! any way good nite i say now! the next one is a report about a little festival down here in EBERSBERG! the aim of it was to earn money to buy a part of the amazonas wood which still gets destroyed by MEGASTUPID UNHUMAN PIGS...i'm no peacefucker,but it is reckless not to fight against it! well now to the report,there were four bands...A SCHOOL BAND JIM JAMS HAUSALARM OVERDRIVE the whole fuck began at 7pm(!) and the school band started! lotsa little chil dren were there and listened to that crap,they used their instruments good but they covered old 60'-songs! fuck teds! "a good start" after 3/4 hour the formation JIM JAMS began! the singer SAM is a good friend to me and he told me one time that they play blues music so i didnt expect too much! but what ca me was a mixture of rock,bluess and ha rdcore,a perfect CROSSOVER... i really loved their STYLE,the singer also danced around on the stage in a very funny way,which increased the cr owds's mood,but the both guitarists on ly stood around like stupid which de- creased it back,hehe! anyway they were very good! the only thing which was dis turbing me were some prolo farmer meta llers who were headbanging in front of the stage! bwark! at 9pm the already known punk formation HAUSALARM started to play! they were mighty scared of get ting blamed because the other two bands before played very good(not the style, but using their instruments) and haus- alarm was only a simple punkpogoband! but their reputation has flown them be fore! already with the 1st song a lit- tle crowd began to pogue...the first song was LONELY BOY by the cure???!!! poging to the cure??! then they played 1-2 "slow" songs(for they conditions!) then the real smashers came,the covered songs like FRAGGLES from the tv series MARMOR,STEIN und EISEN BRICHT the old song and ESPECIALLY COOOL they covered slime's BULLENSCHWEINE! while i pogued around the schoolspeaker of the school where the gig took place entered the stage (the school speaker is a pure pu nk,kewel) and shouted into the mic... BULLENSCHWEINE,BULLENSCHWEINE IN DER GANZEN WELT and so on and at the end he added SCHWEINE,IHR! hahaha! all in all HAUSALARM brought the most fun on this evening! after that a complete bullshit entered...OVERDRIVE! first they poused the logo OVERKILL and then they pla- yed some FARMER SHIT WUERG KOTZ BILLIG METAL,baaaaeehhh! nobody listened to them anyway,hehe! after that we went to fetch some pizza,first we arsed the pizzamen by saying 'avanti,avanti!' and so on and then some of us didnt buy their stuff,hehe! when we went back we saw a policecar in front of the skool because a stupid little psycho has be- aten up two little kids,aaaaargh! oops the side is out,that's it suckbrains! yo pals !! open your eyes, hold your breath, cause here it comes : the TOY DOLLS concert report from the 17.04.91 in the theaterfabrik in munich! let's hit it : i (imbecil) met some of my friends (7) in the train to munich. some of 'em yet had had a beer and were slightly tipsy. we had some silly talks till we were there. in unterfoehring we had to walk some minutes till we arrived at the THEATERFABRIK, a big let's say disco. as we entered some bulls made a bodily search for sharp things. then we were in as we had arrived much too early, we sat down and ate sumthin. after about one hour the lights went out and LUSTFINGER, a german band, entered the stage. with the first song, as we wanted much fun this night we started pogueing around. the mood rised and after about 5 songs it was over. some minutes passed, then a intro was heard, we all knew:the intro from the new toy dolls album FAT BOB'S FEET (look also in the test corner) !! then there was a big 'toy dolls, toy dolls' from the crowd. they entered,olga first in line. all toy dolls (3 in all) wore some sun-glasses, a yellow t-shirt and black trousers. they began playing and the mood was on top level in the whole theaterfabrik. noone stood around without moving,jumping,moshing,pogueing or smashing. the worst thing was, that, between th songs, they didn't make any break, not a second. i was down after let's say 5 songs of pogueing. after sum other songs there was a break, in which the two guitar-players played two banjos on their knees. also while this, some still jumped around in the crowd. i went the the bathroom to wash off the sweat in my face. then it was to go out again. they had nearly yet again begun. i was £no second too late.after another group of songs i suddenly missed my friends. they had all gone to the seat-places, cause they were all in. no condition, i say. after having drunk a SPEZI, mixture of coke and fizzy drink, three of us, me amoung them, got down in frontof the stage again and had fun till the end of the concert. the toy dolls had to play 3 extra songs, till the crowd was satis- fied. after the concert all rushed out. we had to stay on the platform for 'bout 15 minutes at a temperature of 5 degrees as our trousers,t-shrits and pullovers were wet from the sweat, they nearly be- gan to freeze. it was awful. afer coming home i took a shower and tried to sleep afterwards, but i couldn't. i was too excited. if TOY DOLLS should ever come to your town, you MUST be there. you won't get a better concert ever. reminder: look in the tours corner for their world tour...
Bullshit
this is for ANOTHER TIME the BULLSHIT corner... we should have got some JOKES by PRI of DEPREDATORS,but they didn't arrive somehow! anyway i try to squeeze some out of my brain... (sorry 4 german only,but the jokes sou- nd better that way!) faehrt der KOHL mit der hannelore nach afrika und sie machen'ne safari durch den dschungel! auf einmal sieht die ha nnelore elefanten und fragt den helmut 'was sind den das fuer tiere?' 'dangerus' sagt dieser! kommen die bei- den an giraffen vorbei und sie fragt wieder was das fuer ein tier ist! sa gt der kohl wieder 'dangerus'! fahren sie weiter und kommen an einer horde affen vorbei und die hannelore fragt wieder und der kohl sagt wieder 'danger us' jetzt will die hannelore aber wis- sen warum der helmut weiss das alle ti ere dangerus sind,sagt der kohl 'ja,ga nz einfach! auf dem schild da vorne st and ALL ANIMAL ARE DANGEROUS! joke?! kommt der kohl von einer safari nach hause zurueck und trifft nen alten kum pel 'hallo helmut,wie war's den in afr ika?' 'ja,sehr gut' 'und hast auch was erlegt auf jagden' 'ja,natuerlich, 'viele notmes' fragt der freund 'was ist den das,notmes?' 'ja,das sind so kleine schwarze viecher,die schrein im mer 'not me!' 'not me'! was ist das,es ist 50 meter lang und hat noch keine schamhaare ??????? DIE ERSTE REIHE IM NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK konzert! huhuahahahahahaahah! yo,zisch dir noch'n bier!!!!! £ uraltjoke... kommt der kleine hansi zum baecker und sagt 'bitte 99 semmeln'. sagt der bae- cker 'ja,warum nimmts nicht gleich 100? 'sinds bloed oder was,wer soll den die vielen semmeln essen?' hoho!... good advice for WORLD NEWS readers... catch the girl - kiss the girl - fuck the girl...sounds easier to me than that chapter SUNDRIES...?! SEE YOU,PALS ROUGH of CHROMANCE signs off...
D64 MD5: d988ca4505115659eff3a30b84f635c0